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Excerpt from How to be Happy Though Married
Chapter One: The Pleasures of Marriage
"Single women have a dreadful propensity for being poor, which is one very strong argument in favour of matrimony."—Jane Austen, c.1816
“Romantic love is a species of drunkenness – even dullards are aware of this; they are aware of it when they are not in love, and either forget it or disregard it when they are.”—The Art of Making a Perfect Husband, 1929
“There is no road to wealth so easy and respectable as that of matrimony.”—Anthony Trollope, 1858
Chapter Two: The Pains of Marriage
“There are three things that drive a good man from home: a roofless house, a smoky chimney, and a quarrelsome woman.”—Medieval peasant proverb
“A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. “—Michel de Montaigne, c.1580
“Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.”—Albert Einstein
Chapter Three: Hints for Husbands
“According to the old custom, Egyptian women did not wear shoes; this was so that they should spend all day at home. With most women, if you take away their gilded shoes and bracelets and anklets, their purple dresses and their pearls, they too will stay at home.”
“One shouldn't be too inquisitive in life...
Either about God's secrets or one's wife.
”—Geoffrey Chaucer, The Canterbury Tales
This pocket handbook of matrimonial guidance brings together the wisdom imparted to newlyweds throughout the ages. From the advice of Ancient Greek philosophers (e.g. keep your wife under control by stealing her shoes - she will never leave the house) to Edwardian musings on appropriate behavior in the marital bed and beyond, this gift book offers a fascinating and humorous survey of the pleasures and pains of married life.